It is so painful when I see that my sinful choices have caused others pain and grief.
It hurts even worse when, after I repent, they choose to stay bitter, destroying their own lives further.
We may understand why they cling to bitterness because it feels, to them, that they are somehow making me pay for my crime, that they are protecting themselves from further hurt, that forgiveness would be tantamount to saying that what I did to them was trivial.
I remember a young man who was wasting his life in drugs and sex and talked his girlfriend into the same life. He then went on to find freedom in the Lord Jesus but she went on to die from the drugs. He found it hard to accept forgiveness, since, if he had not pulled her in, she might have still been alive and nothing he could do would bring her back.
I’m sure the apostle Paul can relate, when he affirmed that ” everyone should realize that I Paul am the worst sinner that ever lived ” He had killed Christians, they were dead, no hope of bringing them back. He could have wallowed in self-contempt and we would be missing much of the New Testament and the western spread of Christianity.
I can assure you that God not only forgives me but he loves to bring good from my evil for his glory. He loves to help me bring healing into the damage I have done, if the other’s freewill allows it.
Here is an important question. When I sin and others are caused pain and loss—1.Who is sinned against? 2.Who is the victim of the sin? 3.Who stands to be blessed by the event?
Psalms 53:1-4 KJV Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.
Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.
For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.
So WHO IS SINNED AGAINST? I did NOT sin against the person hurt, I sinned against God, that is why he is justified in forgiving me and I are justified in accepting that forgiveness, whether the other is able to forgive or not. Psalms 51:4 Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight: that thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest.
2 Corinthians chapter one 1-7. Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.
