We don’t want to be a burden, so we don’t share with the ones who love us, which makes us a real burden because they wonder how we are doing and feel helpless to help.
Instead of not sharing we should help them help us.
Of course this would take some uncomfortable honesty because every conversation, to result in real growth, must begin with what I am doing to mess things up, how is it that I yield my body members to doing the opposite of what God would have suggested. It must then proceed to my awareness of God’s ideal, of the painful results of my current approach and of what I am already doing to let God change me and the plans that I have for future support and growth.
BEFORE I share all this,though, I need to let them know what I am looking for from them: Do I just need encouragement and support? or accountability, or feedback as to what has worked for them in similar situations? Or do I need them to just listen or to go with me as I go to address a situation. And, of course I always need their prayer, which is enhanced in effectiveness by my giving them a specific situation or time for prayer support.
It is important to be specific about both my problem reactions not about the stress problems of my life but about how I need God’s help in changing MY RESPONSES. I need to give specific situations not vague generalities, Unless to share specifics would hurt someone else’s reputation.
Lastly I need to listen to responses without saying YES, BUT! I need to then go apply all of the advice that fits with God’s word and then tell the other person how their advice helped me.